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    saying goodbye
    Saturday, December 09, 2006 (7:23 PM)

    As the loud crowd gathered on a lazy Sunday afternoon, the chilling sound of a mobile phone rang. It played the happy tune of Merry Christmas, yet there was something strangely odd about it. Amidst the cheerful lyrics and upbeat tune, there was a tinge of sadness somewhere hidden amongst them.

    “We wish you a Merry Christmas, we wish you a Merry Christmas…” the phone rang relentlessly. On a hot and humid afternoon, even a cheery tune as such would get on one’s nerves. “Why can’t this person just answer the phone?” I shouted in my head only to realize that it was my phone. Hurriedly, I answered it, “Hello?” The lady over the other side of the phone sounded anxious, “Where’s your mum? How can I contact her? Tell her Grandma’s in hospital and her condition is critical!” I was dumbfounded. For a moment, I stood there unmoving. When I regained my senses, I tried to calm the nerves of the caller as much as I was shivering myself, “Alright, I will get her to call you as soon as possible. Bye.”

    Next thing I knew, I contacted Mum and told her to call Aunt Casey. As much as I had hoped to hop onto her car along the way, I could hear Dad telling Mum to ask me to go home to look after Grandpa in the background while they rushed to the hospital. I was reluctant but I had to obey.

    When I opened the door to our living room, I headed straight for the incense. I lit them up and knelt down. In my heart, I prayed for the well-being of Grandma. “Please, let Grandma pull through this. Please.” All I could do for the rest of the day was to wait.

    During this period, time began to crawl and even slowed to a stop. The minute-hand of my watch took eons to move an inch yet the sky seemed to have darkened prematurely. Suddenly, the door creaked open and I saw Mum drying her tears. “Lost” I thought to myself. Deep in my heart, I knew we have lost Grandma but I kept silent. I punched myself from within as my heart wrenched at the thought that I never got to see Grandma one last time. All I wanted to do was at least say goodbye but even such a dream seemed too far-fetched already.


    getting old part II
    Friday, December 08, 2006 (11:06 AM)

    as i held mum's hands while i sang Jay Chou's 听妈妈的话, i noticed how frail and wrinkled her hands are. i ought to spend more time with her. more more more!