books and friends should be few but good
Wednesday, April 26, 2006 (10:54 PM)
how true is this idiom? probably very true. but that is not why i don't have that many friends in school. when the system works in such a way that it is almost impossible to find a same person in 2 different modules in the same tutorial slot as you, i don't think i have many choices. i sure do recognise a number of faces and there are exchanges of hi-byes when i see them but it's difficult to make friends in modules where there are no projects. come to think of it, the more-than-hi-bye friends i have in nus are mostly my project group members, period.
but thinking further, i have this belief that most people are in the exact same situation, so why should i feel down? so what if i know the whole nus population and all i do with them is exchanging hi-byes.
today was the paper i dreaded the most. history. but also the module i made the most number of friends. reason? the final project is a tutorial group effort. 26 people doing one presentation. we were divided into 2 groups one dealing with film and the other with court martial though. despite that, more than 10 people in one group is probably the biggest project i've ever dealt with. i'm thankful it's over and prof farrell is right. there's no point making this an open book exam because the questions he posted, seriously doesn't need the open book. the first time in history that a history module i took does not require the regurgitating of facts. nus is indeed developing intellectuals over intelligentsia. though i will not do well in this 'intellectual module', i will definitely fail if it were an 'intelligentsia module' as proven in my records.
last paper will be on friday. 20mcq, open book. but i'm not that confident because philosophy is a weird module. also pessimistic, if i were to use one word to describe it. i haven't done the berlin reading and i do not intend to do so because i have no access to it. it's not printed in the readings and the online reading is locked with a password that nobody knows. how great is that?
and the best part of this idiom? books should be few but good. which is why i don't do my readings. i don't think they are good books. =)
death sentence after last supper
Sunday, April 23, 2006 (11:41 PM)
nothing religious about this entry. nothing to do with the cruxifixion either. it's not even really a supper. neither is it a death sentence in its most literal sense.
i just came back from dinner alone downstairs because i was dead tired today. slept past midnight for the past few weeks and woke up at 1030 this morning then went for jamming session. had first meal at 12+. went for another makan session after jamming at around 3+. reached home and k.o.ed till 7+pm. apparently, the sleep kinda slowed my digestion so i was still a bit full after waking up. went for dinner at 10+pm and got reminded by the surroundings that i do enjoy late night/early morning walks when not many people are around and there aren't that many vehicles on the road. the silence and cool breeze is amazing.
then i came back and picked up today's straits times. when i hit the page on the 'death sentence' of former kpmg ceo eugene o'kelly, it's tuesdays with morrie all over again. when diagnosed with brain cancer, in his last days, he wrote in his memoir that he started thinking more deeply than ever about his life than he had. doesn't that sound familiar? that's the amazing thing that death does. it's the point when people start recollecting and have an overview glimpse at what they had done and the workings of this world. time just flies sometimes, but when we start noticing the details of this world, even the steps of a pigeon along the streets is intriguing.
speaking of reading the papers, my 7 year-old cousin called one morning a few weeks ago. he was asking me what cartoon i like to watch, and not being one who hits kids central button on my remote, i told him, '我不看电视的 leh' and surprisingly, he asked, 'HUH? then 你每天坐在 computer 前面?' hoping to get some good influence on him, i told him, '没有 lah 我每天看报纸' and the best part of his answer came, 'HUH? 你是老人 liao meh?' LOL...
生きる道しるべ
(12:27 AM)
-lost-
looking for my signpost...
見上げた空 きれいでした
君の事を 思いました
君のように 強く前を向いて
歩いていけたらと
こんな声は 届きますか
君の胸へ 響きますか
君の背を 生きる道しるべに
今日を 歩いてます
「君」ってだれ？父さん？絶対違うだろう・・・
母さん？その他？
教えてくれ・・・
suddenly have this lost feeling... so yanling's gonna work in the ministry of foreign affairs... what am i gonna do? when you get to this stage in life, there's really a point when u start to realise, how fun it is to be in school. not so much primary school to be honest. most people tend to enjoy sec sch more probably coz that's the age when we seem to know enough to have the fun we want and have lots of friends. almost 40 people per class and it's real easy to make friends. then you'll realise what i am lamenting about again.
it's at this time when you are not really that old, but you aren't really that young anymore then lots of problems start to come. when am i gonna start work? where am i heading? what work should i do? and uni life is really... undesirable in some sense. especially for poly grads. the jc bunch has their own clique when they get in so we tend to fall outside.
am talking to jolin while doing this and realised that she doesn't like uni life either. i had thought she was enjoying it though. conclusion? school life is really all about making friends. that is why i'm not studying hard. =)
ministry of friends
Saturday, April 22, 2006 (8:46 AM)
seems that a lot of people are going for government jobs nowadays, not to mention the entrepreneurs. though not most of my friends are working for the ministries, there's a significant number heading in that direction.
the most popular of all, ministry of education. to work as a teacher? no. the site says 'general education officer'. it's the era when we are less interested in the actual job and more interested in having fanciful titles. after all, the job scope nowadays don't fit the titles. a clerk, now known as 'administrative executive' simply does every other job no one else wants to do. the linesman in soccer matches have been linguistically promoted to 'referee's assistant' because apparently, 'linesman' sounds derogatory. how? don't ask me. a technician is now a 'technological executive', a network engineer is called a 'network consultant' and a young mama shop start-up is called 'ceo'. it is fair enough to call qian hu's boss a director because afterall, it has grown to a corporation.
i had contemplated going for the moe teaching award mailed to arts undergrads months ago. but thinking of the bond and the students nowadays, it's hard to put my pen to it. no doubt, the salary is attractive with a minimum $2406 for degree holders. and mind you, that's the salary during training. after training, it could go as high as $3292. but then again, is it all about the money? probably not. i've seen how mr. suhaimi kinda regretted taking up the teaching bond. he was in his first/second year of bond when i was in tpjc for the 3 months of 'harrowing experience' and he couldn't wait to get out of teaching line. the whole experience in tpjc was fine except for the toilets. ask anyone in the 2000 batch, you will know how terrible it stank during that period.
speaking of toilet, i wonder who designed my toilet door. it is so user unfriendly and dad has to choose it. oh well, we've lived with it for almost 9 years now. i just remember the first time grace came over, she didn't dare to call out to me when she got trapped in the toilet. it was until quite some time later, probably around 15-20 minutes, that michelle asked me, 'how come grace take so long? you better go check it out'. it was only then i realised she could've been trapped in the toilet. when i went into the kitchen, there was no sound in the toilet. then i called out, 'grace, are you trapped?', hearing my voice, she started moaning like a kid frightened out of her wits, couldn't wait to get out of there. thankfully, the door was pretty new, and i helped her release the knob from outside (don't worry, i don't go around releasing door knobs). when the door opened, she jumped out patting herself repetitively as if she'd just seen ghost. since then, she never dared step into my house again. muwahahahaha... *stupid door* but it was pretty funny that she just waited in the toilet for someone to come along. there wasn't anyone else at home anyway besides mich, shar, des and jun. she could've just shouted. des is another funny character. towards the end of an iiso tutorial, he wanted to go to the toilet urgently but he thought he could've just waited for a while more since it's ending soon. but doris teo kept talking and talking and he was so desperately in need of a toilet that he actually typed www.toilet.com on his browser. talk about fantasizing. i got lost somehow talking about toilets.
anyway, teaching is tough work which is exactly why not many people can last decades of teaching. many simply leave once their bond is up. there is only one person i know of going to work with the ministry of foreign affairs but it sounds pretty cool to deal with foreign delegates, not so much the policy making. the posting overseas makes it sound more fun, except that it's like 3 years. doesn't sound so fun anymore huh? no one can beat jun when it comes to fun at the ministry. of course his job isn't that much fun but it's the ministry that youngsters love the most - the ministry of sound.
brokeback gym
Sunday, April 16, 2006 (11:09 PM)
-made in california-
i was waiting for my turn at the water cooler when i heard constant stamping behind me. it was really loud and a lady's voice rang helplessly in my ears. i turned around and saw a middle-built lady with long black tresses bent forward on the automatic treadmill trying to keep herself on the treadmill. her body was bent forward and arms stretched out like an ape escaping from a predator. it was scary as scenes from happy tree friends flashed in my mind. i was worried that she might hurt herself. when she finally landed on the floor, i could hear her laughing at herself. so i thought, "be a gentleman" and i went forward to ask, "are you alright?"
no answer.
i tried again, "are you alright?" at the same time trying to help her straighten herself. then she turned around. a man's face was right in front of me and said, "yes" in a mixed frequency voice of deep-high-deep kind of wave form. no doubt about it. the kind of off-tuned voice can almost only come from one kind of people. herms.
later when we walked past the function room where a dance class was going on, i was talking to guang and smiling at the same time. while smiling, i turned to look into the room where this particular student was sashaying so damn hard and before my smile faded away, the student turned around and saw my smiling face. it was herm.
deep in my heart, i was hoping i didn't just become the other leading cast in brokeback gym.
legend: herm = her + him
寻人启事
Thursday, April 13, 2006 (4:44 PM)
i'm looking for a girl who took bus 53 towards bishan on april 12th 2006, wednesday night. she was wearing her school uniform, which i think is brown colour or maybe green. no idea but should be jc student. she was sitting on the left side near the front of the bus where the 2 seats faces each other. i think she was wearing blue sneakers and ankle socks, using a nokia 7370.
i'm the guy in white polo-t, bermudas standing to her south-eastern direction. i boarded the bus along the stretch of old tampines road near hougang at around 10pm or later and alighted before her.
i just feel some affinity and would like to befriend her. if you happen to know who she is and how i can contact her, please let me know. there will be rewards: good karma. =)
i quit...?
Tuesday, April 11, 2006 (5:08 PM)
i'm running low on steam. whenever we get to this phase, i always feel like giving up the degree and move on with a diploma to my name. but so many other people i know are quitting their jobs to go for a degree.
i knew i shouldn't have touched history modules - at all. i took it up and this is what happens. 2 papers, both c+. to be honest, i'm not so quite put off by the c+ grades since i know i suck at history. in fact, with the organization, or rather lack of it, i'm thankful that i got c+. but what's bringing my morale down are the comments my lecturer wrote. he is one man who doesn't cushion your butt before caning. one whip and he makes sure you are not going to sit on your ass for weeks.
first paper, the comments were to some level, discouraging but still alright. second paper, the comments of disappointment and frustration that he wrote of, that i made the same mistakes as with the first paper, that he thought i would improve after the first paper. but he didn't realise i submitted the second paper before getting back the first one.
if i can hang on to the c+ after the exams, i'll be real grateful but i suspect something is going to go wrong. take a look at my nice track record:
failed all history tests and exams in sec 1 except one minor test with borderline pass.
failed most history tests in sec 3. the remaining were all borderline passes.
failed all history assignments in my 3 months with tpjc.
then the same old question comes back - what is this blind pursue for a degree for? guang went on for a 2nd diploma. aaron went on for a 2nd diploma. for what? interest. what about me? degree, but so what? my purpose was to major in japanese studies so that i can apply for scholarship to japan for 1 year but now i am doing english major instead. we read of people dropping out of school and making it big so many times, but how many are willing to take the risk? what's more, i only have 3 more semesters to go, do i really want to drop out? $6000 gone to school fees. am i willing to give up without a fight? maybe i'm not...
a day's prophecy, a lifetime's lesson
Wednesday, April 05, 2006 (9:07 PM)
i didn't realise i have such intolerance for procrastination, yet i am one who procrastinates. but then again, when doing group project, i seem to have lower acceptance for last minute work. in a peer evaluation, i gave the last-minute-work guy a pretty low grade. if other people rushes last minute work, i am all willing to help but when my group members do that despite an agreed upon completion date, i feel there's irresponsibility especially when the work is only complete one day before submission. then today i realised another member did worse and i have greater intolerance for irresponsibility over last minute work. i'd rather you do a good last minute submission than do a sloppy work. i don't blame her for not coming for the meetings because we had most meetings during her lecture hour since every other time clashes with more people. but her part ended up lesser than 100 words and it doesn't seem like she knows what we did in the report nor did she read it. the last-minute-guy submitted a 1200 word report for his part and the girl removed 900 over words. the report's supposed to have a max of 5000 words which means we should hit somewhere above 4500. we would've had 4800+ words if not the girl removed 900 words. now we have merely 3900+. i kinda suspect she thinks that the max words is 4000.
i hope others' evaluation form would neutralise the grade i gave the last-minute-work guy. at least he did a fantastic report. i wouldn't say the same for the girl.
recently, i got "bedded". if you're looking for who bedded me, you first need to know, by being "bedded", i mean i am becoming like a bed because i'm using bed sheet as my blanket. since we stopped using air-conditioner, my blanket has become too thick for me, so i've switched to bed sheet after months of not using my thick blanket.
on to zodiac predictions. are you a believer of zodiac prophecies? i read the straits times, life copy's daily prediction for each zodiac sign and the today papers prophecies as well. these may be daily predictions, but from a non-superstitious perspective, they teach a lifetime's lesson. there are lots of examples such as those saying something like "mind what you say today before you offend people" and "do not jump into an investment without doing your homework" and "don't dwell on little innuendoes people make". i do not see these as just a day's prophecies. these things teach you how to lead your life. no matter what day it is, one should always mind what he/she says in case people get offended. investments should only be done with careful research and analyses and you get what i mean. i have to admit, i offend people unintentionally all the time. i used to make fun of everything that my mind can think of. now i filter a bit but still do sometimes. haha... thankfully, all my friends have been very tolerant of me and here, i would like to thank all my friends.
today's my birthday if you haven't noticed. my wish list is
1) a round trip ticket to japan
2) either an ibanez 2-0-2 pickup configuration, a fender strat, les paul shaped body with floyd rose bridge (epiphone is ok but preferably esp) or esp ganesa. that's all.
only 2 things, is that too much to ask? i don't mind if you all gather and pitch-in to share one big present. thanks in advance, i'll act surprised if i do get it. promised.
please enjoy a noisy ride
Saturday, April 01, 2006 (10:46 PM)
1) for your own safety, please stand behind the yellow line
2) if you see any suspicious article, please inform the smrt staff or call 999
3) if you are not feeling well or carrying heavy goods, please refrain from standing near the track
4) elderly passengers and passengers with children, please consider using the lift
5) please do not eat at the stations and trains, thank you for keeping the stations and trains clean
6) next stop, outram park interchange. passengers going towards punggol or harbour front, please alight and transfer to the north-east line.
7) this train will terminate at ang mo kio, please alight and wait for the next train. we are sorry for any inconvenience caused.
8) next stop dhoby ghaut interchange. passengers going towards punggol or harbour front, please alight and transfer to the north-east line.
9) next stop, city hall interchange...
10) next stop, raffles place interchange...
11) next stop, jurong east interchange...
12) next stop, tanah merah interchange...
13) next stop, choa chu kang. passengers may transfer to the lrt...
14) next stop, sengkang. passengers may transfer to the lrt...
15) next stop, woodlands. passengers who are going to johor, please take bus number...
multiply that by 4 different languages and you will know how noisy the mrt is. it is so getting on my nerves today at dhoby ghaut station. i have to admit that the information at interchanges are necessary but if people want to go to malaysia from woodlands mrt, they will find their way to take the bus. why does the train have to announce it? as if the announcements isn't already enough to get people on their nerves. they might just decide to tell you how to get to nus from clementi/buona vista/bukit merah, get to cmpb from redhill, get to sentosa from harbour front and everywhere in singapore. keep in mind that the circle line is coming up and there will be more interchanges.
just take a look at the first 5 announcements. i don't have to go on the train to get irritated with the non-stop announcements and on top of that, they turn the volume up at an underground station! plus the sound of the ads from the tv at the station, i can't read a book properly or talk without raising my voice and transport fees just keep rising with such a "desirable" environment. our stations used to be so relaxing...
i just hope some unnecessary announcements like the one at woodlands station can be removed. consider removing #3 and #5 as well. i had thought the stations in japan were noisy with the unique and bloody loud polyphonic music at every station possible. it could've been the cause for earthquake though.
can somebody publish this on digital life?