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    cried myself awake
    Saturday, February 25, 2006 (10:44 PM)

    we often hear of people who cry themselves to sleep. for my case, i cried myself awake. last night, i dreamt that my favourite cousin passed away. it was devastating. i tried finding out how it happened but no one offered to tell me. in fact, everyone refused to tell me. in the dream, mum told me to forget about finding out how and why it happened. she told me to just face the fact that it happened. i felt that something was seriously wrong. something must have happened that they chose to hide it from me. everyone i asked told me not to ask anymore. i was devastated. i was flooding tears and wailing madly like those scenes we often see on tv. i regretted not playing with my cousin more often. suddenly, i woke up and felt my eyes wet. lying on my left, my right hand reached to touch my face. tears. tomorrow, my relatives will be visiting. i had wondered where to go. after this dream, i'm bank on staying home to play with my cousin. he's only 6 year old. a petty little kid. but a cute one at that. my favourite cousin. this dream shook me. cherish before you lose anything.